I sometimes woke up in the early morning like 4-5am and could not breathe well. I did not think that I would have a phychological problem at that time. It was about 15 years ago when I faced the biggest finacial problem. I almost forgot about the memory but every time I face some problems of my business, I would try to fix them as soon as possible. In my deep mind, I might have some traumatic issue that I do not want to go back to that time. I would like to explain how difficult starting business from NOTHING today. This is because I never recommend people to start their own businesss.

It was not betrayal but I was just stupid

 I became my own boss and thought that I would be easily succussful for my IT marketing company. Actually, one of my best friends was working for a big company as an IT manager and he told me that he can give me a job if we make an email marketing system that they want. My younger brother was a good IT engeneer who could make the system. Everything stated perfectly, I believed.

 At one time, the boss of my friend was suddenly transferred to another division(it’s very common in Japan.) and a new boss did not trust my friend. After all, the first 3 months that we spend for the big company was almost nothing. We got some fees but it was lampsum. We missed getting a stable annual contract from the company. If we could not earn enough amount of money to feed us in the next 3 months, we would have been bankrupt.

what I did in the next 3 month

 All I could do is to do my best. I visited as many companies as possible and asked them if they can try our email system. Our system? We did not have any system at that time. We had an ideal email system idea only but did not complete it because of no customers.

 I had and still have a great sales skill because I used to work at bank as the account manager. Surprisingly, one of big companues was interesed in our system but they had a big problem about badget. I knew their budget would be too small to make our venture survive but it would be only way to continue our business.

My younger brother left me after making our system

 When my brother joined me, he told me that he would leave in 6 months if we can not make our business stable. He quit my company after making an email system for the big company. I was an only person who would work for my company. I transferred to a very small office and commuted there by bicycle for 45 minutes. I did not have money, employees but I had only a big customers which always demanded a lot. 

Trying to get small contracts

 I used to work for a bank which would be one of the biggest companies in Japan. I did not think my company as a small company. So I always tried to get a big contract. It was completely my mistake and I started getting small contracts and different kinds of contracts from email marketing.

I did all things that I can do in order to make feed my family. I did a consulant jub, became a  board member of a small company and joined a training for an insurance company. I threw all of my prides that I used to work for a big company and that I have a good education.

 I was waking up in the early morning and walking outside to breathe fresh air. I do not remember well but gradually when I earned enough money to make my business stable, my memtal illness had disappeared. I just remember it was a toughest time in my life.

 Why could I make my business stable? I guess, my body almost died but my eyes still had a passion. I never gave up even if others critisezed me. I trusted me although I was overconfident. All I can say is that I am a survivor from the hell which is called starting business.

I will write more details about that mext time.

Thanks for reading all.